This week we have been writing our own original versions of Pandora's Box with one crucial element changed! Below is an extract from Haddy's story. Our focus this week was on editing our writing once we had written it, to ensure that our sentences remained coherent whilst still including impressive features.
Long ago,when no pain or sorrow existed, there lived a titan named Prometheus. One day he grew tired of gazing at the empty earth and decided to create a new being, mankind. When Zeus (leader of the gods) found out, he was fuming as they looked like gods, which seemed an incredible insult to him and his family.
'Prometheus! How dare you mock my family with your idiotic creation! Dare to anger me again and I promise you, you shall suffer the consequence!' he boomed ferociously.
One day, Prometheus was watching over mankind when he realised they were shivering in the frosty winter air. Hence, he sped up to Mount Olympus (but first reassured himself Zeus wasn't home) and stole fire from the sun! When Zeus came home, his anger whipped through the kingdom like a tornado!
Well done Haddy! I like your use of drop-in clauses and brackets to include additional information.
ReplyDeleteWell done for using exclamation marks and the adverb ferociously in your writing. We will try to use adverbs in our writing too. Also, we liked that you checked your work to make sure it made sense. Sometimes we forget to do this, but next week we will try to remember to do it.
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